If you are like many people, when you hear the term domestic violence, you think of physical abuse at the hands of a domestic partner. While this is an example of domestic violence, domestic violence is so much more. Numerous behaviors, when exhibited towards another person, are classified as domestic violence and qualify for a Domestic Violence Protection Order.
If you are a victim and can’t decide whether or not to seek help, please do not hesitate. Here are a few behaviors you may not have realized are abusive.
1. Isolation
Very often an abuser will attempt to control you by isolating you from your family or friends. They do this by creating hurdles in your relationships, making you choose between them and your friends, or damaging your relationships with others.
They will often try to convince you that they, the abuser, are the only ones who have your best interest in mind. Some behaviors that may be used to isolate you include:
- Needing to know who you are in contact with at all times
- Forbidding you from talking to or seeing friends and family
- Checking your phone, mail, or social media accounts regularly
- Not allowing you to participate in family, social, or work events
- Telling lies about you, embarrassing you, or making you look bad in front of others
This form of abuse is designed to make the abuser the sole focus of your time and attention. It is also to keep others from seeing what is taking place in your relationship, or giving you advice on getting out.
2. Financial Control
There is a difference between having joint accounts in a relationship and being a victim of someone exhibiting financial control over you. Financial control or financial abuse is one of the most common forms of domestic abuse and occurs in 99% of these cases.
Financial control may take place subtly over time or may take place all of a sudden. When an abuser exhibits financial control, they are often attempting to prevent you from working, limiting your access to money, controlling how all monies are spent, forcing you to work for them without pay, and more.
Another type of financial abuse takes place when your abuser refuses to work themselves but forces you to turn over your pay. In these cases, they may also run up large amounts of debt on joint accounts with no intentions of paying it back or ruin your credit score.
3. Spiritual Manipulation
Many women are attracted to men they meet in church or who appear to have a strong spiritual connection. Unfortunately, these men too can be abusers and can use spiritual manipulation to abuse you.
Spiritual manipulation is not limited to any type of spiritual practice, denomination, or beliefs. It can be perpetrated by those practicing or not practicing a particular faith. Spiritual manipulation can be occurring when various things occur. Some of these include:
- Insulting or ridiculing your religious practices or beliefs
- Forcing you to practice their practices or beliefs
- Forcing you to change your faith or denomination
- Forcing you to give money or resources to support a cause you don’t believe in
- Using scriptural texts, religious writings, and teachings to justify their abusive behaviors
Spiritual manipulation is no less damaging than any other type of abuse. It is often a form of psychological abuse and both are wrong.
If you are experiencing any of these behaviors, you are not alone and you can get help. The Law Office of Leonard Ernest Kerr can help you file for a Domestic Violence Protection Order and find resources to keep you safe. Contact us for more information
